The Difference Between White People and Black People

Jim Goad,  Taki’s Magazine

Imagine for a moment that you are an intelligent and self-sufficient Martian living in a plush, temperature-controlled trailer home somewhere amid the vast frozen plains of that lonely red planet.

Also imagine that through the miracle of advanced Martian technology, you have Internet access—it could even be AOL, it doesn’t really matter. Let’s also pretend that your curious, veiny, overdeveloped Martian brain, despite its better instincts, has become fascinated with those foolish simian earthling humanoids, particularly the “white people” and “black people” who inhabit what will be known for a little while longer as the United States of America.

Since you are a Martian, you have no childishly naïve prejudices—nor any meticulously acquired adult postjudices—about frivolities such as “racism” or “injustice” or “equality.” You merely want to know the difference between white people and black people, and to keep it “relevant” as the teen earthlings are fond of saying, you confine your search to the prior week’s news. You search the phrases “white people” and “black people” over the preceding seven Earth days.

What would you learn?

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